I’m not in the room!

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Stephen King is quoted as saying that he isn’t be in the room when he’s writing.  I haven’t got the exact quote.  But it’s something like that.  That’s where I’m at with my writing.  Cheers!

I am writing my second book Abigail.  In it the heroine has a depression.  I write to raise awareness about mental illness.  As I write, I realize that I have a depression as well as suffering from anxiety.  I didn’t know this until this month when I started writing my second book.  As I write, I become the person I am writing about.  As I write, I see my depression for what it truly is.

I find it hard to do the basic things in life like taking care of myself and especially, cleaning.  Cleaning depresses me so much that I have had help for over ten years.  But now as I am aware of this, I am slowly taking back my own life and cleaning.  I am also taking better care of myself.  One of the first signs of a depression is lack of self-care.  If this is happening to you then know that you are probably suffering from a depression and seek help.  At first you family doctor can help.  If it’s serious he or she will tell you to seek professional help.  But the family doctor is the first step.  Open up.  Talk about your depression.  You are important to the people around you who love you and to humanity itself.  Everyone has their special something to offer their loved ones but also people around them.  Be it friends or even strangers.  Who knows?  Your kind actions may help someone out of their own depression without you knowing it!  You matter!  Take care of yourself!

Cheers!

In addition, writing helps with my mental illness.  Something about writing down what happens in my day helps me.  Expressing it even just in the written word helps me.  Try to write it down.  You could start a story.  Where the hero is you.  Or you could just keep a journal.  Write down the little things in your day as well as the major events.  Write my friend write!  An slowly you will heal.

photo credit:  Jan Kahanek with Unsplash

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Drop-in Session with a group of ladies.

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I went to a drop-in session with a group of ladies.  It was interesting and made me think of things that I hadn’t thought of.  Slowly I heal.

I take the time now to talk of my personal demons.  I have never come out and said it out-right but you may have sensed that I have been struggling from my poems.  I haven’t talked to you about this before.  Today I have the courage to do so.  I was sexually abused by my babysitter when I was a child.  Luckily my father figured out that something was up and cut all ties with that family.  But he never knew the extent of it because I never talked to him about it.  On top of that I have blocked out everything about it but my body remembers and for the last ten years I have been struggling with the knowledge that it occurred.  Slowly I heal.

I had the courage to go to a group session yesterday.  The group session turned out to be a drop-in session.  Technically I guess you could still call it a group session.  We watched a video about being generous to people and not dehumanizing them with bad comments.  Then we discussed the sex scandals in the news and how we didn’t know all the details.  In addition a thought provoking question came up.  How do you know when you have healed?  No one had the answer to that.  I don’t know.  I’ll wait to figure that out.

The drop-in session was good for me.  I had wanted to talk more about my situation but that will come with time.  I made friends with two people and gave my phone number to one.  She’ll be calling I’m sure.  So I have connected with individuals who have gone through the same thing as I have which is a positive thing.  There was a sense of camaraderie in the session.  I can make friends there.  I am looking forward to the call from that one person.  A drop-in session or a group session is highly recommended.  It helps you to share your story with people who have gone through the same thing that you have gone through.  I think that this is an important step in the healing process.

I have started a new book called Abigail.  In it the heroine suffers from a depression and is dealing with abuse.  I used my personal life to guide what happens to her in the book.  She too went to a drop-in session and slowly she heals as well.  It is very therapeutic to write about my life in a story.  Perhaps you too could start writing your own book.  Put in things that happen in your life!

Slowly I heal.

 

Photo by Becca Tapert on Unsplash

My writing space.

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Meredith Gibraltar shares her writing space with you all.  Cheers!

Yes it’s my dining room table.  We no longer eat at the table.  I spend many an hour especially in the mornings typing away at my laptop.  I do not take a pen to paper.  It is all done with the computer.

I am now working on  my second book Abigail, introducing the characters.  It will be a romantic suspense of a woman who is at the wrong place at the wrong time with respect to organized crime.  The book speaks of her struggles when she is followed and also of her depression.  I try to incorporate stories of mental illness into my books to raise awareness among my readers.

Cheers!

We stand together…a poem.

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Meredith Gibraltar writes the last poem for her first book Martha.  Cheers!

We stand together.
I still have the demons of my past.
But with you I am stronger.
I don’t lose sight of my goal.
To stand alone against my demons!
You give me strength.
But the battle is still mine.
My inner demons want to shine.
But I stand strong.
My battle is never ending.
But I stand strong.
Your touch gives me added strength.
A peace amidst the storm.
Your touch gives me added strength.
I am alone no more.

Book Review by J. Biggar…More Than A Lawman by Anna Stewart.

A journalist and a sexy detective team up to catch a serial killer in USA TODAY bestselling author Anna J. Stewart’s new romance! Haunted by the death of her childhood friend, journalist Eden St. Claire has dedicated her life to catching serial killers–and she’s always done so alone. But when the lethal murderer Eden is tracking puts […]

via More Than A Lawman by Anna J. Stewart #BookReview @RomSuspense @AJStewartWriter — Jacquie Biggar- USA Today Best-selling author

Reblog..Book Review of Legacy by Danielle Steel…Review by Johansaywhat?

Start of fall and I just felt like wanting to scan a good fiction book so what I did, I went to my host mini library in their house and saw a Daniel Steel collection. Going through it, all of them seem interesting but what I pick is something that is close to my […]

via Legacy by Daniel Steel (Book Review) — Johansaywhat?

I am honored by a miracle!

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Meredith Gibraltar writes a poem about being a grandmother.  Cheers!

I am honored by your presence.
A child of my child!
You fill me with joy and hope.
My heart soars with love.
I cherish your soul and your spirit.
You are a miracle!
The miracle of birth!
I know the science of it.
But you are also a soul and a spirit.
Something to be cherished.
Something to be protected.
I am in awe of your perfection.
Such a tiny thing.
A life made new!
A clean slate upon which only you can write!
Welcome Erik!
I am honored by your presence.